i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
