I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
