if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
