thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize
