The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
