It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize