Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Randomize
