WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
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