You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize
