Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
