While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
The uberlube is also flammable
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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