I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
