just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Alive.
So much puke
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
