So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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