Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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