Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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