sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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