There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I think my moral compass just broke
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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