hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
