We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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