The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
