I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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