Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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