You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
