im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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