her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
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