So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
