It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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