This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
