Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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