also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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