To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Randomize
