it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize