I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
