Nicole vs. Life
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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