Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I need water and some morals
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
