two words: eviction party
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
