Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize