Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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