I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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