Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
