We won't sleep together?
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize