So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked