it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
