u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
