he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
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youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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