do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You dont lie about slip and slides
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
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