Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
