Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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