Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize