Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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