The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
